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The Connected Child: Bring hope and healing to your adoptive family, by Karyn B. Purvis, David R. Cross, Wendy Lyons Sunshine

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"An extremely useful parenting handbook... truly outstanding ... strongly recommended."
--Library Journal (starred review)
"A tremendous resource for parents and professionals alike."
--Thomas Atwood, president and CEO, National Council for Adoption
The adoption of a child is always a joyous moment in the life of a family. Some adoptions, though, present unique challenges. Welcoming these children into your family--and addressing their special needs--requires care, consideration, and compassion.
Written by two research psychologists specializing in adoption and attachment, The Connected Child will help you:
- Build bonds of affection and trust with your adopted child
- Effectively deal with any learning or behavioral disorders
- Discipline your child with love without making him or her feel threatened
"A must-read not only for adoptive parents, but for all families striving to correct and connect with their children."
--Carol S. Kranowitz, author of The Out-of-Sync Child
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"Drs. Purvis and Cross have thrown a life preserver not only to those just entering uncharted waters, but also to those struggling to stay afloat."
--Kathleen E. Morris, editor of S. I. Focus magazine
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"Truly an exceptional, innovative work . . . compassionate, accessible, and founded on a breadth of scientific knowledge and clinical expertise."
--Susan Livingston Smith, program director, Evan B. Donaldson Adoption Institute
"The Connected Child is the literary equivalent of an airline oxygen mask and instructions:� place the mask over your own face first, then over the nose of your child.�This book first assists the parent, saying, in effect,� 'Calm down, you're not the first mom or dad in the world to face this hurdle, breathe deeply, then follow these simple steps.'� The sense of not facing these issues alone--the relief that your child's behavior is not off the charts--is hugely comforting. Other children have behaved this way; other parents have responded thusly; welcome to the community of therapeutic and joyful adoptive families."
--Melissa Fay Greene, author of There is No Me Without You: One Woman's Odyssey to Rescue Africa's Children
- Sales Rank: #3292 in Books
- Published on: 2007-04-22
- Released on: 2007-04-22
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 9.00" h x .50" w x 6.00" l, .85 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 288 pages
Review
"...an extremely useful parenting handbook... truly outstanding because of its numerous examples of scripts and phrases that parents can use... this book is strongly recommended." -- Library Journal (starred review), April 1, 2007
From the Publisher
A hope-filled resource for parents who have welcomed children: -- From other countries and cultures -- From troubled backgrounds -- With special behavioral or emotional needs
"A tremendous resource for parents and professionals alike." --Thomas Atwood, president and CEO, National Council for Adoption
"A must-read not only for adoptive parents but for all families striving to correct and connect with their children." --Carol S. Kranowitz, M.A., author of The Out-of-Sync Child
"The Connected Child is the literary equivalent of an airline oxygen mask and instructions: place the mask over your own face first, then over the nose of your child. This book first assists the parent, saying, in effect, 'Calm down, you're not the first mom or dad in the world to face this hurdle, breathe deeply, then follow these simple steps.' The sense of not facing these issues alone -- the relief that your child's behavior is not off the charts -- is hugely comforting. Other children have behaved this way; other parents have responded thusly; welcome to the community of therapeutic and joyful adoptive families."
Melissa Fay Greene Author of There is No Me Without You: One Woman's Odyssey to Rescue Africa's Children
About the Author
Karyn B. Purvis, Ph.D., is the director at Texas Christian University's Institute of Child Development, which hosts the Adoption Project and its Hope Connection camp.
David R. Cross, Ph.D., is the associate director of the Texas Christian University's Institute of Child Development and a professor in TCU's psychology department.
Wendy Lyons Sunshine is an award-winning journalist.
Most helpful customer reviews
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful.
Must for all parents
By Sarah Poling
This book is so helpful. A rich resource for ALL parents. It's even better if you connect with the Empowered to Connect April simulcast and see videos and get tips/strategies to implement the concepts. Children do better when you are aware that their behavior (good or bad) reflects their needs, and often the adults around them need to be aware and help the child meet those needs if they need the child to make a change in their choices. This book helps adults process how to approach and interact with children while identifying their needs, addressing the fear or safety need, or the physical need (hunger, thirst, exhaustion) or the emotional need (broken, alone, scared, sad, mad, angry) and helping the child gain skill in appropriate reactions or behaviors. It takes a lot of processing and practice, but so worth it. There are also videos online that help make the concepts come alive.
7 of 7 people found the following review helpful.
A Must-Read Parenting Book!
By Valerie R
I don't often rave about parenting books because everybody has their own style of parenting and every kid is different. There is a reason there are thousands of parenting books on the market. However, this one stands alone! I only got this because it was required reading for our adoption agency, but I am SO glad it was.
Though there are times when I wished the author had gone into greater detail (especially on the nutrition chapter), this book does a great job of providing parents with MANY tools that I feel every parent can benefit from. It is geared toward adopted/abused children, but I really felt like it pertained a lot about my biological children as well. This book can give you a sense of control especially with stubborn, strong-willed children. I speak from experience. I don't know which is more helpful, the tools offered by this book or the sense of having options. I don't think you can go wrong with this book!
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful.
Highly Recommended to Me - and I Recommend to You
By Aerion
This book was recommended to me by my adoption caseworker and by other adoptive moms in a public forum. I strongly recommend it! We are about to adopt siblings and, even though they don't have any current behavior concerns like hoarding or RAD, this book has still been helpful in parenting any children who have experienced trauma. The book has lots of examples and lots of specific ways to help connect and support your children. I'm about halfway through the book now (I read half and then re-read half with a pencil, making notes and underling parts I wanted to remember) and the chapters on "Felt Safety" and "Teaching Life Values" have been the most helpful so far - well, that our struggles are not ours alone - others have had them and many have surpassed them. Karyn Purvis is an expert in the field - and after reading this book, I understand why her name is so well known. Her work is realistic, down to earth, and filled with hope. If you are adopting or work with foster or adopted children, this is a great read.
The book's main points are:
- The key is to treat the whole child - and we'll help you do that!
- Start where your child is
- Compassion is key
- Focus on nurturing and structure / connecting and correcting
- "At-risk youngsters are capable of making tremendous strides toward overcoming early hardships and limitations."
See all 281 customer reviews...
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